CHANGE THE VIBRTION!
CHANGEMENT DE LA VIBRATION!
CAMBIAR LA VIBRACIÓN!
When we're single, seems we exhale a particular smell... So particular as the glances we shot at the street, at the clubs, at parties.
Always looking for a new fling. A new love. Full of instinct.
Being single have particular advantages. And I love them all.
"Apegar-se é o problema, porque quando você se apega não pode ficar vazio. Não se apegue - essa é a mensagem dessa técnica. Apenas não se apegue a coisa alguma positiva ou negativa porque com o não-apego você encontrará a si mesmo. Você está aí, mas devido ao apego, você fica escondido. Com o não-apego você ficará exposto, você ficará descoberto. Você explodirá."
My aunt came back home, last week, after 21 years living in another country, too far away from home.
She said: You look so differente! Your smile! You look quite handsome!
For me, she seems different, too. But with the same hair cut, the same smile, the same way to tell things.
After this, I started thinking about memories.
The time can flow, pass like the Halley comet, erasing faces, colors, textures, whatever! But never, it will never erase the brotherhood, the memories, ties, affection and love.
Ontem, minha tia voltou para o Brasil, após 21 anos fora. Quando ela partiu, eu estava com 5. Ainda lembro da partida. Desde então, nunca mais nos vimos.
Ontem foi a primeira vez, após os longos 21.
Eu levei um par de gérberas vermelhas. Lindas. Um agrado, uma representação do sentimento de boas vindas. Um carinho.
E lembrei de alguém que, de certa forma, me ensinou a fazer, sempre, a diferença.
In life, we have some moments that make us start to thinking about something.
Yesterday, I went out for a meeting. It was a party for celebrate the anniversary of a girl-friend of mine. There were many different people and I didn't know the majority of them. I was like a foreigner at the unknown land. But I was fine, comfortable. I was laughing and kidding.
There was a woman with a different kind of energy. A different kind of presence. The little party happened in a restaurant and she was sat close to me. Suddenly, we were laughing together, kidding together, making jokes together.
The time to go has come, we said goodbye and she talked: I loved you!
After this, I started thinking: when it comes for friendships, in my life, everybody loves me, wants me forever and ever, needs me. But in my sentimental life, it doesn't work like that.
I will not cry a river or whining. 'Cause I believe - at least, I have to - I'll find somebody will love me, not just like a friend, but like a man, too.
But, after this affirmation, I've ever made, right now, by my own, I can't help, but wonder: when we're good in friendships, can we be good in relationships, too? Or vice-versa?
O ego é o pior inimigo do ser humano.
É como um vício, que precisa ser alimentado diaramente. E, dependendo de sua intensidade, com doses quase que cavalares.
Deve-se tomar muito cuidado com ele. Pois, com certeza, não é quem você é. Ele é o que os outros querem, quiseram e quererão que você seja.
Yesterday, somebody said I smile with my eyes.
Was a woman. And she had a shining smile.
Juro que não vai doer se um dia eu roubar
o seu anel de brilhantes.
Afinal de contas dei meu coração
e você pôs na estante.
Como um troféu
no meio da bugiganga,
você me deixou de tanga.
Ai, de mim, que sou romântico!
Kiss baby, kiss me baby, kiss me!
Pena que você não me kiss,
não me suicidei por um triz.
Ai, de mim, que sou assim.
Quando eu me sinto um pouco rejeitado,
me dá um nó na garganta.
Choro até secar a alma de toda mágoa,
depois eu passo pra outra.
Como um mutante,
no fundo sempre sozinho,
seguindo no meu caminho.
Ai, de mim, que sou romântico!
Kiss baby, kiss me baby, kiss me.
Pena que você não me kiss,
não me suicidei por um triz.
Ai, de mim, que sou assim!
Yesterday, I went to a graduation of older people who returned to school. The majority of them were more than 40 years old. And later that day, I started thinking about time.
It's never too late for begining again. For trying something new. For start a new life if you're not satisfyed with yours.
Sometimes, we stay too comfortable with the way of life we're in. Just because we decide, always, for the easier way. Nothing is too easy, even the easier way. Because when you look back upon your life, you'll see that you spent too many time doing things for everybody, but nothing for you. And then, you'll face a very hard reality. Your reality.
It's better fight for the best, even if it's harder, than live in a sad and ridiculous life.
So, there will be the day we'll see the sun shine on our shoulders, and it will make us happy.
Perhaps, the happines is not a condition or a way of file. Or a fraught state of mind.
I think it's like the sun shining. There are days it is. There are days it is not. Because of the clouds, the rainny days.
We can't be happy every single day, full time. We just can have moments of happiness, of joy.
There is a huge difference between "to be" and "being".
Now, I'm single again.
With a new history in my curriculum and a long, long way to keep walking.
That's my life. That's my karma.
"[...] que no peito dos desafinados,
no fundo do peito bate calado.
É que no peito dos desafinados
também bate um coração."
"No fundo é uma eterna criança
que não soube amadurecer.
Eu posso, ele não vai poder
me esquecer."
I woke up at 10:15 AM. A good night, terrific asleep. Remote Control in the right hand and I powered on the television.
Zapping. Chanel 75. HBO.
Vicky, Cristina, Barcelona. Was Woody Allen, reigning with those all dialogues about relationships.
I laughed.
Perhaps, Woody Allen materialize his movies when disfunctional relations happen.
Brazil lost. So do I.
I've never thought that soccer and love walked so close.
And after everything, I couldn't start thinking about anything. I, the type of person who thinks about all troubles.
I don't know what think. I don't even know what say.
I just don't know.
I'm a misunderstanding guy.
And if I loose myself and don't know what to do, what will see me through?
I'm feeling alone.
And I don't know if it's good, or not.
Again, I don't know.
Perhaps I'll stay with this "don't know thing" for a long time. 'Till I understand why not me.
What have I done so wrong to deserve this?
And I still don't know.
How long will I keep myself at the "non-known zone"?
And our wine? Our song? Our breakfast?
The espressos? The brownie? The words? The letters?
The strawberries? The kisses? The feelings? The hugs?
What are we gonna do with them all?
Put on the bag and keep in a closet?
Or put on the bag and throw in a garbage?
I don't think so.
Now, it's all about questions for me. But I want answers.
I want everything back.
I want you. I want me. I want us. Together.
Now, we belong together, don't you remember?
I'm still the same. I'm still here.
Star shining bright above you
Night breezes seem to whisper 'I love you'
Birds singing in the sycamore trees
Dream a little dream of me.
Say nighty-night and kiss me
Just hold me tight and tell me you'll miss me
While I'm alone and blue, as can be
Dream a little dream of me.
Stars fading but I linger on, dear
Still craving your kiss
I'm longing to linger till dawn, dear
Just saying this.
Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you
Sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you
But in your dream, whatever they be
Dream a little dream of me.
And then, after a split ball, I got hurt.
It's part of the game.